A Fresh Perspective on Singleness

It has been a while since I have published a blog. In fact, I am interrupting a series that I have been working on to post this blog. (The series on Universal Questions will return soon, so check it out!)

My life has settled down a little bit after a move to Orlando and beginning a new career. I figured now was a good time to get back to blogging regularly, so I am hopeful that I will be able to do that now.

The last few days I have given a lot of thought to this topic, the topic of Singleness. I considered keeping these thoughts private, but I feel that maybe they could help someone. My intent is to be as open and transparent as possible, because I feel that only then can I capture what is on my heart.

So here it goes-

I am a single male. I am reminded of this daily. Reminders come in all forms and if you are single and reading this, then you know exactly what I am talking about. Relationships, engagements, weddings, etc. I am in the midst of the age where this is happening to most (but what seems like ALL) of my friends.
And honestly, its tough. It really is. But more on that later. 

So today when pondering my singleness, I sat down and really examined my heart. I prayed and asked for some clarity. I questioned my thoughts and emotions.

So as I said, being single is tough sometimes. But why is that? What causes the emotions that lead us to want to be with someone? Where does the longing come from?
I mean, of course I want to have my own family one day, but isn’t that a really shallow perspective when you think about it? In many ways, it is inherently selfish. And selfishness is the antithesis of a good motive.

With this in mind, where do we begin?

I submit the following thoughts for you to ponder:

Whole in Christ
For in Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form, and in Christ you have been brought to fullness. He is the head over every power and authority.
 Colossians 2:9-10
As Christians, our ultimate fulfillment comes from a relationship with Christ. We look around for the person that God has for us, instead of looking up to Him. He is enough. He is sufficient. We would be wise to pursue Him. 
Relationships as an Idol
 
I discovered today that an idol I had in my life was the picture I have of relationships and marriage. Its been years since I have dated anyone due to the nature of my last relationship. Recently the longing for a relationship has returned. Don’t get me wrong, this is a good thing. Remember, it is not good for man to be alone. I am not demeaning marriage or relationships. They are a good thing. But we must make sure that they are not the only thing.
Follow the Example of Christ
 Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ.
1 Corinthians 11:1

Consider Christ. We are called to be imitators of Christ. What example did He set for us? Complete devotion to the will of the Father. That is where our focus must be as well. Christ came to the earth on mission. He came for the lost. And as His Redeemed, that is our mission too.
Our Role as the Bride 
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her  to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word,  and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 
Ephesians 5: 25-27

As the Church, we are the Bride of Christ. Christ is constantly sanctifying us. Why would we do anything to harm this process? Again, I am not saying that relationships and marriage harm the sanctification process. What I am saying is that sitting idly by, just longing for a wife or husband, does hinder the sanctification process. Be patient. Seek Him. 
I want you to be encouraged by this perspective. This season of life is valuable. Don’t waste it.
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